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What The Dutch Can Teach Us About Our Daughters And Sex

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Rather than emphasizing gender battles, Dutch parents talk about sexuality as emerging from relationships and are strikingly silent about gender conflicts. Follow the Opinion section on Twitter latimesopinion and Facebook. Understanding and accepting without disapproval the teen viewpoint and experience is very important. There are some significant demographic differences that affect those numbers. You are now following this newsletter. The American girls had become sexually active at a younger age than the Dutch, had had more encounters with more partners and were less likely to use birth control. The Dutch actively discourage promiscuity in their children, teaching that sex should emerge from a loving relationship. Other participants were drawn from the general teen population. Teens assert independence by breaking rules, rupturing their relationships with parents, separating from the family. The sexual revolution transformed attitudes in both countries, but, whereas American parents and policymakers responded by treating teen sex as a health crisis, the Dutch went another way. Even though the Dutch have the lowest teenage pregnancy rate, an effort has been made to better understand contraceptive and abortion behavior. Here's a solution for parents concerned about their daughters' sex lives.

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Aug 12, given that parents of teenagers should object to their children's sex lives? from parents to the news that their high-school-age children are sexually Sleepovers have been normalized in the Netherlands for decades now.

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Description: Our teen birth rate is eight times higher than theirs, and our teen abortion rate is 1. Rather than emphasizing gender battles, Dutch parents talk about sexuality as emerging from relationships and are strikingly silent about gender conflicts. Their government made pelvic exams, birth control and abortion free to anyone under 22, with no requirements for parental consent. We end up with a self-fulfilling prophecy. But rather than resulting in crazed teen orgies and high rates of teen pregnancy, abortion or transmission of STDs, the Dutch have far lower rates of these problems than the U. Because the Dutch seem to have it all figured out. We are a more diverse nation than Holland, with higher rates of childhood poverty, fewer social welfare guarantees and more social conservatives. An American sex educator named Charis Denison, for instance, told me that roughly half the questions she fields from students about parents involve how to get contraception or testing for sexually transmitted diseases without Mom and Dad finding out. the other half are on how to bring up sensitive issues so they will actually listen. More than that, though, there was a stark difference in how their parents approached those topics. That's not to say that it's a free-for-all over there. They reported more comfort with their bodies and their desires than the Americans and were more in touch with their own pleasure. As Salon reports , this practical attitude — and data favoring it — extends to teenage sex. Negotiating the ground rules for sleepovers, while not always easy parents admit to a period of "adjustment" and some embarrassment , provides yet another opportunity to exert influence, reinforce ethics and emphasize the need for protection. The Dutch girls said that teachers and doctors had talked candidly to them about sex, pleasure and the importance of a loving relationship.
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